From Jack and Rose in Titanic to Romeo and Juliet, the chemistry between two people is what makes many feel a strong attraction. However, is chemistry really what you’re looking for in a partner?
Often, intense chemistry is simply lust and nothing more. Luckily, there are some signs of true chemistry.
Physical attraction
Physical attraction is one of the first signs that a couple has good chemistry. They tend to draw closer together in crowded places and often find themselves staring into each other’s eyes. They also show a lot of body language that shows they’re attracted to each other, such as blushing and holding hands.
They may also be attracted to each other’s thoughts and ideas or feel an emotional connection with them. This can be shown in conversations that are deep and meaningful or through intimate actions like long hugs and snuggles.
They might also find themselves saying things like “I love you” or swaying in each other’s arms and singing together in public. Those small everyday courtesies doled out to each other are what create a true bond.
Emotional attraction
When you feel a deep connection with someone and their personality, values, interests, or sense of humor it’s called emotional attraction. It is often less instant than physical chemistry but can develop rapidly. It is more long-term than sexual attraction and can lead to strong friendships or romantic relationships.
When someone you’re attracted to is kind, respectful, and dependable and makes you feel valued and understood it’s not just their chiseled physique or mesmerizing eyes that pull you in. It’s their entire personality that has you wanting to spend more time with them.
You admire things about them that you also see in yourself, like intelligence or loyalty. This is what leads to emotional attachment. You find yourself thinking about them even when you’re not in the same room.
Opposites attract
From Jack and Rose in Titanic to Romeo and Juliet, we’ve seen many romantic couples who have chemistry that carries them through life. It’s a feeling of being magnetically pulled to someone, a connection so strong that you can spend hours in their presence without even realizing how long you’ve been talking.
Interestingly, studies have shown that opposites don’t really attract. Researchers found that the most successful relationships are those that have similar interests and values.
This is why it’s important to take a closer look at yourself and your partner. A therapist or relationship coach can help you determine whether your relationship is a good fit. They’ll be able to assess your current level of compatibility and can provide suggestions on how to improve the health of your relationship.
Shared values
According to dating coach Erika Ettin, shared values are one of the most important factors in a happy relationship. This means that you and your partner believe in the same things, such as communication, trust, and respect for each other’s opinions. This can include similar religious and political beliefs, lifestyle choices, or career goals.
At work, shared values can mean that you and your colleagues have a common set of work attitudes and principles that you value and share. This creates a sense of camaraderie and can increase employee engagement and productivity.
The shared value approach puts business back into Einstein’s world, moving it out of its Copernican center where every societal issue revolves around profit-making and into a solar system of interdependent and interacting sectors where social progress is the measure of success.
Complimentary characters
A couple that has chemistry feels as though they are the perfect match for each other. They can’t wait to spend time together, and their thoughts are dominated by each other. They are a constant presence in each other’s lives, and they may even start mirroring each other, such as the way they talk or how they dress. They also tend to lean toward the same opinions. These are signs of a healthy, balanced relationship.